Labels

This week, one of my kiddos was called a name at school. It happens. Kids call each other names and feelings get hurt. It's truly a part of life. The school handled the situation well and the child apologized and life goes on.

Yesterday, this same kiddo came to me very embarrassed because she had gotten in trouble. She told me she called another kid in class a name. The school again handled the situation well. She apologized to the student and life went on.

As I'm talking to this kiddo, she tells me that she called the child gay. She has no idea why this is hurtful because she didn't say it to be mean. She wasn't making fun of him. She saw him hugging another boy and so she said he was gay. She did apologize because it hurt his feelings. She did feel bad because it hurt his feelings. She just doesn't understand why it hurt his feelings.

Her calling him gay wasn't a bad thing in her mind, because being gay isn't a bad thing. It makes a lot of sense when you put yourself in her shoes. We recoil because we know that a lot of people think it's bad to be gay. She didn't even think it was mean because we've taught her that it's not bad to be gay.

We have explained that friends can hug friends. Boys can hug boys and girls can hug girls and it doesn't mean they are gay. Boys can hug girls, girls can hug boys and it can just mean they are friends. Especially at the age that they are.

So we talked about labels and we talked about not writing on another person's name tag. We talked about labels that are okay to call someone; friend, buddy, fun, etc...We talked about labels that aren't okay to call someone, not because being that is bad but because we don't want to put that name tag on them.

Steve commented that things are a lot more complicated now then when we were growing up. I agree. We will just keep learning love. We will just keep teaching love.