Son Hugs

I called Trey into the kitchen.

"Give me a hug"

"Ok"

"Tighter please"

"Ok...ummmm...mom, are you okay?"

"Yep, just glad you can give me a hug."

I begged my Ariez, my non-driving son, to please be safe when he's with friends. Please always wear a seatbelt and please don't ever take away my chance to give him a big hug at the end of the day.

My heart hurts for the momma that will never get to hug her 16 year old baby again. I cannot imagine that kind of loss. He went to school and never came back. It happens every day. It happens all over the world. I don't want to ever have to feel that.

So I pray for the momma of the 16 year old boy that didn't come home Wed. I pray for the family that got the worst phone call of their lives Wed. I pray for the friends that will never see him smile or hear his laugh ever again.

I pray for the other families that have been impacted by the accident that happened Wed. At least five families that will never be the same after being a part of something so sad and terrifying.

Jax

Steve saw Jax online first. He was featured on the news and we knew if we weren't there first thing in the morning, someone else would surely come scoop him up.

G and I were waiting in the parking lot before they even opened. We were the first people there. When someone else pulled into the lot, we got out of the van and went to wait at the still locked doors.

As soon as they opened, we told them who we were there to see. While we were waiting to be shown a room, the guy that pulled into the lot after us said "I'm here to see Jax." The lady told him that we were already there to look at him but he was welcome to wait.

We sat patiently in the room and they brought this beast of a dog into the room. He still had on his cone of shame from being fixed. He looked into my eyes and I knew he had to be ours. He was patient and loving and sweet and so we called Steve and he came from work to look at him. I wanted to make sure that this was really our dog and the only way to do that, and not be blamed later for getting a bad dog, was for Steve to come check him out.

An hour later, G, Jax, and I were headed home.

We walked into the house and A was TERRIFIED. Like crying terrified. He had been attacked by a big dog once and he wanted nothing to do with him. G took Jax outside and I took A's hand and asked him to trust me. I told him that I would not let anyone or anything hurt him and if Jax wasn't nice to him, then Jax would have to go.

I knew that there was a chance that this could go wrong. If A got hurt by the new dog, he may never trust me again. I prayed that God would show this little boy that he could trust us. That we would protect him. I prayed that God would allow Jax and A to become buds and I prayed that if this went right, A would know he could count on us.

That was on a Saturday. By Tuesday, A had a new best friend. Thank you God!

The Seizure

I want to start this story with the update that the neurologist called last night to let us know that the EEG done yesterday came back completely normal. Ariez has great brain function and there is no reason to think that will be more seizures in the future. They believe that his seizure was a reaction to a medication and that since he is no longer taking that med, he should not have a repeat. We are not in the complete clear for 4 more months, but all signs are pointing towards the good.

Now...on June 24th, I was home for lunch. Ariez and friend were upstairs in Trey's room playing video games. I was getting up to put my stuff away and head back to work when I heard a horrible crash and thumping sounds. I thought they were fighting and I was mad because my kids don't physically fight and I wasn't about to start having it now!

As I headed to the stairs to tell the boys this, the friend came running down. "I think Ariez is having a seizure," a panicked 16 year child tells me.

I ran upstairs and there, admidst the mess of teenage boys, was my son shaking uncontrollably. I yelled for my phone and called 9-1-1 and sat there with my hand on his back.

The seizure lasted for 5-7 minutes and was one of the scariest moments of my life. He stopped shaking and just laid there. Deathly still for another 2 minutes. He wasn't responding to my touch or the sounds of my voice. The 9-1-1 operator asked me if there was anything near that he could hurt me or himself with when he woke up. He said, "sometimes they're combative when they wake up and we don't want anyone to get hurt."

Ariez came to and just sat very dazed. He did ask me where the knife was. There was no knife. The EMT's got here and took over. He got very combative with them and tried to run away. They ended up having to restrain him.

When we got the hospital and were able to see him, the first thing he said was, "those guys tried to kidnap me." He didn't remember me being there telling him that things were okay. That must have been super scary for him. He also said, "ummm...I threw up on them." I told him that was an excellent self-defense move.

We are so thankful that he is okay. We are really looking forward to being able to completely say that he is fine. Thank you God, and all our prayer warriors, for watching out for us!

Always Move Forward

I was reminded tonight that what someone else thinks of me doesn't really matter. I needed that reminder. I AM smart, loving, caring, hard working, passionate, professional, loyal, and a whole bunch of other things.

I am NOT what someone else thinks (not anyone in particular, just people in life). I never have been and I never will be. That is NOT my story.

And so I will carry on and move to the next chapter of my story.

I want to say that if my work at the CAC has inspired to you to be more educated about child abuse and child sexual abuse, please conntinue to be inspired. I certainly am! If my work at the CAC has encouraged you to donate and support the CAC, PLEASE continue to do so! I will be! They need it! The kids need it! The staff needs it! It's such a great, worthy cause and fight!

My passion for the work being done at the Child Advocacy Center is never-ending. I will be forever grateful that part of my story includes being able to support the work (and the staff) being done there. I will be forever touched by the friends that I made there and the uplifting of support that I was given there. I am truly blessed to have had such an opportunity.

So, as "Pop" says to Luke Cage, "forward...always..."

My Aging Eyes

I didn't start out feeling old. I didn't think turning 40 would be a big deal. Then it got closer and I was a little put off by the idea. Then I turned 40 and it was fine. It's weird to think about. It's weird to say I'm 40. I didn't feel old.

Then I went to the eye doctor. No biggie, I go often enough that this shouldn't be a big deal.

And then she said it...this wonderfully nice optometrist that I had never done anything to. "I think it's time to start talking about bifocals."

I said, "but I just turned 40...".

She said, "yep, that's about the time we usually start talking about bifocals."

So...now I have bifocals. They are taking some adjusting to. I don't love them. I am not sure I hate them. In fact, I've noticed that while I'm working, they actually help. The rest of the time, they are not as helpful as I move my head up and down and side to side just trying to find the exact right position where everything is clear.

Nobody can tell by looking at them that my eyes have somehow aged. But I know. I know that my eyes have betrayed me and gotten older.

Ariez

About a week ago, 17 years ago, I got a phone call very late in the night (possibly early morning). Anitra was telling me that she was in the hospital (Good Sam in Kearney) and that her water broke. I thought she was messing me with. She wasn't due until AFTER I was due in November. It was August. I was pregnant and tired. She insisted that she was telling me the truth and that I needed to get to the hospital. 

So I went...and so her water really HAD broken and she really was trying to have this baby boy WAY too early. They wanted to heliport her to Omaha where they were more equipped to deal with this incredibly early labor but the weather was not cooperating. They gave her meds to stop her labor and put her on the ambulance. Terrified. We were all terrified. I called an OB nurse friend and she said "prepare for the worst. Babies born this early (24 weeks) don't make it." 

We prepared for the worst and prayed for the best. The doctors put her on bedrest and they tried as hard as possible to stall delivery as long as possible. 

On August 8th, at 25 weeks gestation, Ariez Dupree Huddleston came into the world. He weighed 1 lb., 13 oz. He was 13 inches long. 

Tomorrow, he turns 17 years old. It hasn't always been an easy journey. There were days it appeared that he wasn't going to make it. He didn't come home until November. He still had to fight. He didn't want to eat (he still doesn't really love to eat), so he fought some more. 

Ares is the god of war. He could not have been given a more perfect name. He has shown amazing strength and resilence in his life. He has won the war for life and if there was a battle for our hearts, he would have won it has well. 

Ariez, we loved you before you were born and will love you until we die. You are force to be reckoned with and we are incredibly proud of the man you are becoming. We celebrate you, not only on August 8th, but everyday because we love you and are blessed to be your parents. I can't wait to see how you win the next 17 years. 

Summer Update

I always have these grand visions of being better at posting...maybe some day...right now I'm too busy living this incredibly insane, busy life we have. My position in life right now is just busy. We have 3 teenagers and one almost teenager in the house. It is supposed to be busy. I wouldn't have it any other way, even on the days that I'm exhausted and complaining...:)

So for now...a recap of summer break and status update...

Tai is doing her internship (which the school calls an extern) in Nantucket, MA. She is working at the Greydon House and is having an amazing experience. She has been greeted by a Kardashian (Kourtney), cooked for several VIP's (including a Kennedy!), and had one of her plated dishes photographed for a magazine. She has visited a really cool whaling museum and I'm told she's going to the beach this weekend. She will be there until the end of September and then classes resume in Hyde Park on October 3rd. 

Ariez just survived his first season of detasseling! He worked his butt off! Up every morning at 4:00 and most days he wasn't home until at least 3:00. He was super excited to get his first paycheck and looking really forward to the final one that should have a bonus on it. Steve and I are super proud of his hard work. His goal for the summer was to get his learner's permit but a seizure in June halted those plans as he hasn't been cleared to drive yet. He's doing just fine and they think it's possible that the seizure was caused by a new medication he was on. SUPER SCARY but glad he's ok. He'll be 17 next week and we are excited to see what his junior year has in store for him. 

Treyson has plugged away at HyVee all summer. He'll keep his job when school starts and will be a junior at zoo school. He's a pretty quiet one and we don't see a whole lot of him. He's been hanging out with friends and working. It's all good because as long as he's working, he keeps paying off the car we bought for him. Ha! He's actually been really helpful in transportation this summer and Genevieve has really appreciated him running her and her friends around while mom and dad are working. 

Genevieve has had a pretty busy summer! First was camp with the church youth group. She was gone for a week to Maranatha Bible Camp. She has such a great experience and relationship with her group. That was followed by her favorite holiday, the 4th of July. She saves her money and buys a ton of fun stuff. This year we all learned the importance of safety with a minor explosion that had the entire street running. :) Then there was detasseling. She figured out pretty quickly that the corn is not her home away from home. It's okay though, she's still young and has a lot of time. Plus, she still has her dog clean-up business and even has another client! G is pretty anxious about school starting but I feel like we've had some great planning and that 8th grade is going to be over before we know it. 

Reyanne is bored and ready for school to start! She is a social butterfly all the way through and being home for the summer is not as fun for her. She is super excited to start 6th grade. She did start the middle school youth group at church this morning and that has been really fun for her. She also has dance and she enjoys that too. A couple of her close friends live pretty close so she's been spreading her wings more and meets them at the high school ball fields to hang out. She didn't go to Minnesota this summer but we tried to have fun! 

Somehow the summer has just about passed us! Lots of sleepovers, lots of grilling out. Lots of noise. :)