Day 3

 My heart is broken into so many little pieces. This is awful. It feels like a nightmare that I can't wake up from. How can my beautiful girl be sitting in jail on a 1st degree murder charge? How did we get here? Will we be able to keep Rileigh and will we be able to keep her safe from all the awful dangers in the world? Will we be able to protect her from the sadness of the choices her mother has made? 

I wish we had been better able to protect Rythm from the sadness in the world and the dangers of things that she's been exposed to. 

When we got the call from the detective early Sunday morning, we thought she was dead. When the detective said first degree murder charge, we worried it was Rileigh. There was a huge relief when we found out it wasn't either of them but nothing could have prepared us for the rest. 

Today, day 3 of this nightmare, we fight. We figure out how to save Rileigh. We figure out how to get Rythm the help that she needs. We struggle to find a peace or normalcy. It's so much. 

It is devastating to hear your daughter call herself a killer. It's devastating to sit and watch her cry the whole time we are able to have a video call. 

There's no sense to be made of any of this. There is no happy ending.